Mike Moser "I Say" Published Dec. 16, 2005

There is a Grinch amongst us

All the Whos in Crossville like Christmas a lot,
But there's Grinch, or two, who apparently do not.
These Grinches hate Christmas - sadly, I do feel
Oh, please, don't ask why, but despite the season, they steal.

There is no reason that has come to light,
Maybe their heads aren't screwed on just right.
But I think that the best reason of all
May have been that their hearts are just too small.

A Grinch was first sighted way out McCampbell Road,
Trespassing, and stealing, at the M.H. Jacobs abode,
Where they cut down, stole, a spruce tree of pine
And in a big heap left Christmas lights behind.

The Jacobs just moved here less than two years ago
And found Crossville to their liking, made it their home.
Cutting of their six-foot spruce, left them so sad,
Such a disdain for Christmas spirit, actually left them quite mad.

Another Who, Samantha Findley can share,
Those feelings because a Grinch left her Christmas tree bare.
The Grinch stole her TV, but that is not all,
The Grinch also stole gifts she bought at the mall.

All of the presents for her family are now gone,
She told the police she been terribly done wrong.
Over $450 in gifts, and her only TV,
Were stolen right out from under her tree.

A Who on Clear Creek Road on Dec. 13
Found out a Grinch can be just so mean.
For while Merle Piper and wife were gone
A Grinch entered their home, didn't stay long.

Just long enough to take from their tree,
All their Christmas ornaments, just how could this be?
At best guess, ornaments gone top thirty-five
If the Pipers could, they skin the Grinch alive.

These Grinches had an idea. An awful idea.
These Grinches had a wonderful, awful idea.
With no regard to their victims,
These Grinches did steal.

Although devastated, these Whos will rise
Above the meanness that entered their lives.
For Whoville is like that, they know what to do,
Pity the Grinch, and say a prayer, or two.

For Christmas will dawn in Whoville this year,
And the Whos who are victims, will find Christmas cheer.
A Grinch might steal an ornament, a gift or a tree
But the Grinch will never steal the spirit in we.

(With apologies to Dr. Seuss.)

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Mike Moser is the editor of the Crossville Chronicle. His column is published periodically on Fridays.