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Mike Moser Psychic should have known better I have never put stock in the flood of late-night
blitz advertising found on television. Talking heads pitch everything
from dice-a-matics that slice and dice and cube and peel ("but
wait, that's not all"), to psychic hotlines where some bimbo
with a mysterious accent waits to give you bad news. Heard on the news that one of these turban-covered
women has been named in a complaint for calling unsuspecting
victims to share her visions when her talents were unsolicited. In other words, the cost of the call is collected
through the phone bill and the victims, in these cases, decided
they did not like their fortunes told in such a way. If the psychic
did this, she should have known better. After all, she is a psychic
and should have seen the complaints coming. I actually had a touch of psychic news powers
and before you write me off, let me finish this amazing tale. While most of the time I could not predict
names or specifics, the feelings proved true. I have even canceled
family trips out of town because of these feelings. Tommy told his wife, Sylvia, about these premonitions
and one Wednesday afternoon while visiting the office she walked
back to the news room, looked me in the eye, and said, "Predict
something." "What," I replied, kinda wondering
what the boss' wife was saying. "Tommy told me you can predict the future.
Predict something." I explained it didn't quite work like that,
and that I seldom could come up with specifics, but that the
next time I had one of those "feelings," I would share
it with her. She returned to Tommy's office, obviously disappointed
that I could not predict on demand. About 20 minutes later this feeling just came
over me and I walked up to the front and told Sylvia and Tommy
that sometime around mid-afternoon there would be a bad wreck.
For some reason, this "feeling" was more of a specific
nature, and I added, "It will be a single car, an elderly
man who will have a head injury but will not die. Oh yeah, and
he is gonna crash into the end of a bridge." Shortly after 3 p.m. the police scanner exploded
with emergency calls of a crash on the Yellow Leaf Creek bridge
on the edge of town. Single vehicle. One victim. Head injury.
Sylvia always listened to a police scanner at home and she heard
the dispatches. When I returned to the office she was waiting
on me, eyes almost dilated. She looked at me and said, "I
don't believe it. That is amazing. Stay away from me." I did make a prediction here a few years back.
A woman from Pleasant Hill called me at home one night complaining
because her name had been published for writing numerous bad
checks. After listening to her question my ancestry and intelligence
and wisdom, I finally had enough and I told her, "You know,
if you would quit hanging paper all over town, your name wouldn't
be in the paper." "Huh?" she said. "Quit writing bad checks, and your name
won't be in the paper," I said again. "Oh," she replied. And I swear, I never saw her name in the police
reports again. I guess she was just waiting for a psychic to
share that with her. As I have gotten older my psychic skills have
dimmed. Maybe I am not in tune with myself anymore. I know I
don't believe in psychics predicting specifics about other people's
future. Case in point: My oldest daughter, Maggie,
came to live with me a few years ago before returning to Louisiana
and school. About three weeks after she left, a telephone bill
in the amount of $400 showed up in the mail. On the call list
were two calls worth a couple hundred dollars to a psychic network
phone line. I called her and took her to task for wasting
money on such calls. I concluded my conversation with her by
stating, "Besides, if that psychic was any good at all,
she should have told you to hang up because I would be mad as
the devil when I got the phone bill." Evidently the psychic wasn't that good at
predicting my reaction. . |