December 8, 2004
Love Light Trees ease grief
Holiday trees honor lives lost to cancer
By
Herald staff writer
For those who have lost a loved one, the holidays can be a particularly difficult time.
Munson Hospice and Palliative Care honored the memory of those held dear with the 10th annual Love Light Tree lighting ceremony at First Congregational Church on Sunday.
"This is a hard time of year," said Jan Stump Tharp, hospice bereavement coordinator to those who came to remember a loved one. "Sometimes we feel like we are on the outside looking in with our grief. The inside of you doesn't match the outside."
The Love Light Tree tradition began when Jane Leidich, a Munson nurse, wanted a way to honor her mother who died of cancer in 1995. While the trees are a remembrance of those who have passed on, they also serve as a reminder that life continues in the face of grief.
"We need to find a way to come in from the cold and keep the light lit," Tharp said.
Coping with grief has become a way of life for guest speaker Maria Housden, who shared insights from her book "Hannah's Gift." The Traverse City native, who now lives in Woodstock, N.Y., spoke of the lessons she learned from her three-year-old daughter, Hannah, who brought courage, honesty and laughter to her fight against cancer.
"Since my daughter's death, this has been my work and also my life," said Housden, who leads bereavement support groups and speaks nationally at conferences as well as to church and civic organizations, students and medical professionals.
"One of the truest things we can say about grief is that there is no good time to loose someone we love. Grief has no rules, no expiration date," said Housden, who encourages anyone dealing with grief to find support.
"We need to come together to support each other because our culture does so little to prepare us for death," Housden said.
In the 10 years since the death of her daughter, Housden takes every opportunity to share her message - "the truest measure of life is not it's length, but the fullness in which it is lived."
"The best tribute I can give to my daughter is to live my life with as much gusto as Hannah would have lived hers," Housden noted.
Throughout December and January, Love Light Trees will be aglow outside Munson Medical Center and Munson Community Health Center. A memory book containing the names of deceased loved ones will be inside the north entrance of the Munson Community Health Center near Urgent Care. Donations to the Love Light Tree help to serve hospice and palliative care patients and their families.