August 18, 2004
Party provides joy for children coping with loss
Michael's Place holds end-of-summer beach party for families and facilitators
By Carol South
Herald contributing writer
"There's a need to know you can still have joy."
Some area youth and their families grieving the loss of a loved one kicked back Monday evening for some food, fun and frolic on the shores of East Bay.
These families, as well as facilitators and administrators from Michael's Place, gathered at the Peninsula Township home of Karen Sehi for the event. Approximately 35 people swam, canoed, kayaked and ate dinner together during the picnic, undaunted by cooling temperatures.
Jacki Holland, program director of Michael's Place, noted that the end-of-summer party deliberately had a lighthearted purpose.
"In the midst of all the grief and pain there's joy," she added.
Approaching their three-year anniversary this October, Michael's Place is dedicated to helping children and adults grieve a loss in a genuine and healthy manner. Chris Dendrinos founded the non-profit organization in 2001. She was inspired to help others - especially children - find grieving rituals after experiencing the death of her cousin, Michael, 33, when she was 14.
Participants meet every Monday evening throughout the year at Immaculate Conception Elementary School to share a meal before splitting into smaller groups. Volunteer facilitators guide each group.
Mindy Buell, executive director of Michael's Place, said the organization has struck a note in the community. Since it began, they have served 140 individuals directly and 650 individuals indirectly. The children and young adults have come from 17 area schools in three counties; homeschooled students have also participated.
The volunteer facilitators form the heart of the program. Completing a 16-hour training program, the 29 facilitators are drawn from all walks of life. Frequently they have experienced loss and grief themselves and are motivated to reach out and help others.
Joe Forrester has a related motivation: the children. A resident of Cedarville in the Upper Peninsula, Forrester has attendee every weekly meeting since June, prompted to return after the first one by the children's requests. This week he began the four-session facilitator's training and is looking forward to contributing that way.
"What I've discovered is that the ones getting lost are the kids, the children," said Forrester of grieving. "The point of grief is that everybody's different and then kids relate where ever their growth pattern is."
Another healing activity for Michael's Place participants this summer has been caring for a garden plot in the Grand Traverse Area Children's Garden. Michael's Place facilitators divided the plot into six sections and families created a small memorial garden in honor of their deceased member.
Mitchell, 17, and his three brothers made a garden in honor of their grandma. He filled the 3-foot by 5-foot section with marigolds that spelled out love surrounded by petunias, both some of his grandma's favorite flowers. He included in the bed an intricate stepping stone, made during a Michael's Place group project, that featured rocks gathered by his grandma and mother.
While making the garden, Mitchell also unearthed a number of connections with his grandma, who was an avid gardener herself.
"My grandma helped start this garden and I didn't know it," said Mitchell of the Grand Traverse Area Children's Garden, which includes a brick with her name on it. "Also, we found out that the lady who owned Breeze Hill was a good friend of my grandma and she donated a whole bunch of flowers, about two times as much as I had picked out."
"We also planted tomatoes for my grandpa because he loves tomatoes," added Mitchell. "It helped him heal."
September will be a notable month for Michael's Place. First, their Fourth Annual Concert to Benefit Michael's Place will be held on September 24 and will feature jazz musician Alexander Zonjic with special guest vocalist Thornetta Davis.
On September 13, the organization will begin a support group for adult survivors of suicide.
"This is geared to anyone whose life has been affected by suicide," Buell said.
In addition, on September 27 the organization will begin a partnership with the Women's Resource Center and Catholic Human Services. Through this, their facilitators will work with children and families grieving an illness as well as children and families who have survived violence.
For more information on Michael's Place, its programs or the volunteer facilitator program, contact Buell at 947-6453 or see the organization's web site at www.michaels-place.net