October 22, 2003
Potty training requires bathroom humor
By
Herald Editor
It takes literary restraint to elevate my ruminations beyond bathroom humor. The inevitable toilet training column sends that all down the drain.
This weekend our 19 month old took her first steps toward urinary independence. This bodily function breakthrough came in the form of a plastic chair with handles; a new throne for our little princess.
Hopefully the potty chair won't become the seat of a power struggle at the Leiva house. At least we were smart enough to pass on the Royal Throne that plays fanfare every time your progeny does his or her business on the pot.
Truth be told, I don't remember much about my toilet training. I was held back a year in nursery school but that was due to social skills, not bathroom spills. My wife finds me acceptably housebroken; after 10 years of marriage I still put the lid down. Overall, I'm free of any bed-wetting, Freudian angst - so good job mom and dad.
The progressive parents that we are, Ella is under no pressure to meet a toddler tinkle timetable. However, lately our daughter has been a real potty mouth. She even waves "toodle-oo" when you flush the toilet. So I can't help falling in love with the idea of not changing anymore Luvs.
While Ella is an equal mix of mommy and daddy DNA, the maternal gross-out gene will no doubt dominate potty training.
Bodily humor goes well beyond the bathroom walls at Charette family gatherings. In fact, crude humor is the linchpin for birthday cards and Christmas gag gifts. This family single-handedly keeps the Hong Kong whoopee cushion cartel in business. A literary work like Shinta Cho's "The Gas We Pass" is considered coffee table material.
No surprise, Ella has inherited this bodily function fascination. She has even taught the kids at daycare two new words: "I tooted." Talk about being a proud parent.
So this past Sunday morning, Ella jumped feet first into toilet training - literally. Her first step toward urinary independence was sticking her footed pajama leg into the potty chair. I took plenty of photos, several worthy of prominent placement when Ella's boyfriend comes calling 18 years from now.
I might not find this so funny, however, if three years from now I'm still taking the same pictures. After all, bookstore self-help shelves are lined with traumatic toilet training stories. I'd rather not be a footnote in that history, let alone a new chapter.
Over the next few months, there will be plenty of potty talk at our house. Hopefully we can keep our sense of bathroom humor if pages from "Tips for Successful Toilet Training" go down the drain.
Grand Traverse Herald editor Garret Leiva can be reached at 933-1416 or e-mail gleiva@gtherald.com