August 27, 2003
Traveling light weighs heavy
By
Herald Editor
After a 96 hour reprieve, the chaos known as parenthood has returned - and not a minute too soon.
In all our years together, my wife and I have never traveled so light as our recent getaway to the Upper Peninsula. Sure we packed the big Samsonite, mountain bikes and plenty of bug spray. However, we left behind 23 pounds of chatty, on-the-go, hide-the-breakables toddler.
Honestly, I was amazed we made it out the driveway before our guilt began weighing down the minivan.
For three nights and four days, Ella stayed with Nana and Papa Leiva while we celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary with a U.P. road trip. While we had spent a few hours away from our daughter before, this was uncharted parenthood territory. After all, the U.P. was a land full of "No Service" cellphone messages.
After 17 months of living with a little one, it felt odd to operate in couple mode. Just carrying on an adult conversation without bodily function descriptors seemed like a foreign language. Equally strange was the ability to hold hands instead of a diaper bag, car seat, stroller or a slobber-soaked Elmo doll.
Not to kiss and tell, but we hung out the Do Not Disturb sign. Let's just say it wasn't because housekeeping might wake a napping baby.
Operating as just the two of us, our vacation brought to light many parenthood truisms.
- The roadtrip. While some adults get cranky riding in the car, you don't have to change their diapers every 200 miles or two hours. Of course that depends on if you're traveling with Great Uncle Earl and his happy bladder.
- Packing. Two thirty-somethings traveling in a minivan is wasted space. However, loading up the vehicle doesn't require super natural spatial skills or an MIT engineering degree. Just leaving behind the surfeit supply of toys increased our miles per gallon by 45 percent.
- Getting ready. Morning, noon or night, it didn't take a cut time Buckingham Palace style changing of the guard to get out the door. No waking up two hours early in order to arrive 45 minutes late. Not to mention the streaking around the house, wrapping toilet paper around the furniture - of course it really gets crazy once Ella wakes up.
- Going out to eat. This is definitely among the top five most significant changes from coupledom to parenthood. A restaurant is rated not by how it prepares its cuisine, but if it serves Mac and Cheese. Buffets are big as are dining establishments tolerant of high decibel levels.
While on vacation we actually ate at restaurants where patrons utilized real utensils. Although this was U.P. fine dining, so you had Schlitz with salmon and Pabst with prime rib.
Of course with all this new found freedom we did what any new parents childless for more than three hours would - we talked about Ella. We also called to "just check in" so she could hear our voices. We even left behind pictures so she wouldn't forget us; as if the child were a cat left alone with a three-week supply of Meow Mix.
While we had perfect weather, no rabid black flies or rancid pasties, our vacation was nearly cut short. By Saturday we were suffering from Ella withdrawals. So Sunday morning we hit the road early and I set the cruise control just shy of breaking the sound barrier. We met my folks in Grayling and Ella greeted us with a big smile and a little dirty diaper.
Within an hour of arriving back home, toys were scattered, the Pictured Rocks snow globe broken, the dog barked to be let in and Ella cried to get out of her highchair. After a 96 hour absence, it was great to be back among the chaos known as parenthood.
Grand Traverse Herald editor Garret Leiva can be reached at 933-1416 or e-mail gleiva@gtherald.com