August 20, 2003
Artwork provides outlet for grief
Art therapy group helps children share projects and feelings
By Carol South
Herald contributing writer
When a loved one dies, handling the grief and accompanying life changes are challenging enough for adults. When a child is faced with a significant loss, giving them the time, space and tools to both experience and handle their feelings can have a lifelong impact.
Dr. Barbara McIntyre coordinates the children's art therapy program to help children heal from a close relative's death. She began working with children in this capacity as a volunteer in 1985 and later helped build the program that is now part of the Munson Hospice.
The Children's Art Therapy program meets weekly and serves children ages 4-18, though participants typically range in age from 6-12. They have lost a parent, grandparent, sibling or sometimes an aunt or uncle they were close to.
Most participants attend meetings for around six months, although McIntyre noted that the children set the timetable for their participation. She asks for an initial ten-week commitment but some children are not ready to face their grief and drop out for a time; they often return when they are ready. The program also offers a mailing program where children receive an art activity or letter periodically to support them.
McIntyre said that the group provides a safe place for these children to grieve, one where they can talk about their loved one and cry if needed.
"With kids, often times there is a misconception that they are not grieving because they can't really deal with grief in the amount of time that the adult can," she said. "They visit their grief in short periods of time and a lot of times it looks like they are not even grieving."
The group setting is especially conducive to working through feelings.
"The kids help each other so much," she added. "They are so compassionate, I am amazed."
Every Monday evening, members of the group meet to talk and share while completing a variety of art projects. The sessions begin and end with special songs - the same ones each week to provide continuity - and include time for discussion guided by the participants' age and needs. After the opening song, participants state why they are there. This matter-of-fact introduction of their loss is part of the healing process.
"This lets them get used to saying, 'My mother died,'" said Evy Sussman of Northport and Minneapolis, a volunteer who helps with art projects four times a year. "It kind of puts them all on an immediate even space and the routine of that is very comforting to the kids."
During the summer, the group meets at the Traverse Area District Library, spending part of each week working in their two garden plots in the Children's Garden.
On Monday evening, four attendees painted terra cotta pots and decorated small bags before heading into the garden to harvest vegetables and flowers. The gardens burst with life and color as children found cherry tomatoes, onions, radishes and beans to harvest.
Emily Beyer, 5, has been attending sessions since April, after her baby brother died in January. Accompanied by her father, Chuck, Monday night, she quietly painted, decorated and picked a vivid flower bouquet to take home.
"It has been helpful, she really enjoys it," said Chuck Beyer of Suttons Bay, noting that a Hospice nurse referred the family to the program. "It's been helpful for her to be around other kids who've experienced a loss."
Art, music and gardening projects provide a creative outlet to express their feelings. Different group projects have included making a memory album, fleece scarves and blankets - which allow them to wrap themselves in memories of their loved on - and holiday ornaments.
McIntyre lost her own father as a child so she feels a deep affinity for these children. In addition, she worked in community mental health programs and nursing homes for years where she began to realize that many people struggled with unresolved grief.
"Research has shown that if children don't grieve they are more at risk as an adult," she said. "We help them deal with the grief they are having."