November 7, 2001
Procrastination column long overdue
By GARRET LEIVA
Herald editor
For months, I've been putting off writing about procrastination - this sentence proves I've run out of excuses or column ideas.
Admittedly, there is a fine line between procrastination and plain laziness. It is the same shade of gray that shadows idiosyncratic and idiotic. The big difference: laziness doesn't just delay the inevitable, it sleeps right through it. Putting off today until tomorrow, however, can cause restless nights.
It's hard to say how many people in the world are procrastinators -we're bad about returning surveys. Almost everyone, however, has at one time or another suffered from the disease known as 'getroundtoit.' Thankfully, mine is a mild case treated with a healthy dose of Post-It Note 'to-do' lists and cold showers.
Unfortunately, you can only postpone procrastination relapses for so long. Which is why I'm writing these words Monday night in my boxer shorts and "Trust Me I'm A Reporter" T-shirt.
Now some may think it strange that with my propensity for procrastination I would chose a career built around deadlines. However, it seems I function best when the clock hands are pointed at the eleventh hour. Although, it may have more to do with the definition of "inspiration" hanging on my wall at work: (noun) an idea that was once considered mediocre, but in light of looming deadlines, appears to be brilliant.
Interestingly, this placard was given to me by someone who watched me walk the procrastination fine line for years - my mother.
Even as a child I tended to put things off. I didn't walk until I was nearly two years old. I was held back a year in nursery school; something about not being 'emotionally prepared' for kindergarten. However, I suspect I didn't eat my allotted quota of Play-Doh.
Grade school meant tardy science projects smelling of fresh Elmer's glue and last minute selling of raffle tickets. Junior high was a futile attempt at delaying the inevitable acne and angst years. High school provided a four year reprieve from the burdens of adulthood.
Then came college - a procrastinator's dream. Force feeding your brain an entire semester of Western Civilization, writing a 30 page term paper using a word processor and multiple two-liters of Mountain Dew, or simply sleeping in instead of sleeping through your eight o'clock math class. Top this off with turning 21, and no wonder some people squeeze four years of college into seven.
Now a full-fledged adult and with fatherhood in the future, my procrastination prevalence has decreased. Despite my improvements I still put off returning irate phone calls, filing income taxes and getting 'turn your head and cough' physicals. That and the occasional column.
It has been said that procrastination if the hardening of the 'oughteries.' Humorist and journalist Don Marquis noted that "procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday." I wonder how long it took him to write that down.
Grand Traverse Herald editor Garret Leiva can be reached at 933-1416 or e-mail gleiva@gtherald.com